“Honey? Where’s my super suit?” – The Incredibles

When someone asks ‘where is your Christmas spirit?’ is it wrong to point to the liquor cabinet?

“Soup is just a way of screwing you out of a meal.” — Jay Leno

“Why did no one warn me [eating ice cream/walking the dog/taking a picture with a baby] was so dangerous?”

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you’re probably drunk.

Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.

I hope you dance like no one’s watching because they’re not—they’re taking selfies.

My wife and I always compromise. I admit I am wrong and she agrees with me.

You know that feeling when the really cute girl walks by in the mall, and you smile, try to be smooth, and take a drink of tea, and run the straw up your nose?

You are a serious rock star, but you need much more efforts to start my rock.

There’s no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap.

Nothing is cooler and more attractive than a big comeback, and that’ll be me

“Nothing in the world is ever completely wrong. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.” – Paulo Coelho

During the day I didn’t believe in ghosts. At night I become a bit more open-minded.

Happy birthday. May your Facebook be filled with messages from people you never talk to.

Mirror: you look amazing today. Camera: No, you don’t.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.