I’ve never been cool and I don’t really care about being cool. It’s just an awful lot of time and hair gel wasted

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s 7 years in a row now.

A human being without a friend is like a tree in a desert.

I love that you are my person and I am yours, that whatever door we come to, we will open it together. — A.R. Asher

“You had my curiosity. But now you have my attention.” – Django Unchained

“Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.” –  Bill Cosby

Be a flat in a room full of stilettos

“Folks, I don’t trust children. They’re here to replace us.” – Stephen Colbert

Marry someone who has a different favorite cereal than you so they won’t eat all of yours.

“Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you’re offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone’s feelings.” – David Sedaris

Shutting the fuck up is gluten-free. Add that to your diet.

It’s hard to find a friend who’s cute, loving, generous, caring, and smart. My advice to y’all is, don’t lose me.

You don’t have to make something that people call art. Living is an artistic activity, there is an art to getting through the day

“Time to witness the handsome!” – Lancelot (Mobile Legends)

One day a man asked a genie to make him smarter than any other man on earth. The genie turned him into a woman.

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.

Dear vegetarians, if you’re trying to save animals, then why are you eating their food?

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.