Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

When the bus driver starts driving before you even get to your seat.

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept

BRB = I don’t want to talk to you. LOL = I have nothing else to say. Cool = I don’t care.

Just saw the most smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.

We’re each responsible for the beauty we carry with us, ever day.

Today, you will get married, and I will eat cake. It’s a win-win for sure.

“Things worth having are worth waiting for.” – Me, preheating the oven.
Diet tip: Don’t.

There’s a guy at my office that we all make fun of because he’s clueless. Today I found out it’s me.

Before you judge me, try walking a mile in my shoes so you can see how little I care and how good it feels to be a mile away from you.

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

A good friend is there to bail you out of jail. A best friend is sitting next to you in the cell.

Marriage is finding the person who puts up with your shit, admires your weird little ways, and still says they love you at the end of the day.

Have you posed by a naked statue today? No, your garden gnome doesn’t count

“By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates

“People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.” – Benjamin Franklin

Listening to a wife is like reading the terms and conditions of a website. You understand nothing, but still, you say: “I agree.”

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.