The plan is to market our original product as a new product that’s as good as the original.

They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?

One day a man asked a genie to make him smarter than any other man on earth. The genie turned him into a woman.

“The funny thing is, the people who work really hard, they work really hard so they can sit on their ass – they just want to sit on their ass in nicer surroundings.” – Karl Pilkington

Drinking every night because we drink to my accomplishments.

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should just live next door and visit now and then.

“You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.” – Hussein Nishah

Just so we’re clear, the Grinch never really hated Christmas. He hated people, which is fair.

“Don’t you find it a little bit (of a) coincidence that the body fell perfectly within the chalk outline on the floor?”

The best things in life are free. The second best are very expensive. – Coco Chanel

What does Charles Dickens keep in this spice rack? The best of Thymes, and the worst of Thymes.

People who act like they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do.

What did one snowman say to the other one? “Do you smell carrots?”

“Why cake? It’s somebody’s birthday somewhere!”

Marriage is a three-ring circus: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

“Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde

I know the voices in my head aren’t real. But sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome!

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.