There’ll be parties for hosting, cocktails for toasting, and caroling sung way out of key.

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Sometimes I have to tell myself it’s not worth the jail time.

I have to be successful because I love expensive shit.

Summer: Hair gets lighter. Skin gets darker. Water gets warmer. Drinks get colder. Music gets louder. Nights get longer. Life gets better

Every day may not be good but there’s good in every day.

We’re each responsible for the beauty we carry with us, ever day.

“I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” – Douglas Adams

Cousins are created so that our Parents can compare marks.

“I got a haircut! It went so well I went ahead and had all my hairs cut!”

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should just live next door and visit now and then.

I have always depended on the kindness of strangers.

If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don’t want to give off the wrong impression.

The ideal man goes home early, doesn’t flirt, doesn’t drink, doesn’t smoke, doesn’t gamble, and doesn’t exist.

You lost your phone and it’s on silent? Too bad, if you liked it, you should have put a ring on it.

Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I’m with you!

“Those proud of keeping an orderly desk never know the thrill of finding something that they thought irretrievably lost.” – Helen Exley

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.