We can train a monkey to fly a jet but we can’t train a man to be humble.

“No man is regular in his attendance at the House of Commons until he is married.” – Benjamin Disraeli

I am so romantic sometimes, I think I should marry myself.

I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status.

“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” – Emma Bombeck

“Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you are making too much money.” – Robin Williams

Going to bed early. Not going to a party. Not leaving my house. My childhood punishments have become my adult goals.

Sometimes I wish I was a bird. So I could fly over certain people and shit on their heads.

“What’s the best way to have your husband remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.” – Cindy Garner

Lord, please give me patience because if you give me strength, I’ll need bail money too.

If you’re wrong and you shut up, you’re wise. If you’re right and you shut up, you’re married.

I hope we are good friends until we die, then I hope we can stay ghost friends, walk through 47 walls, and haunt our enemies.

Make sure to savor all your special moments, step outside of yourself, and bask in your own presence, while it’s still present.

“Love me or hate me, i swear it won’t make or break me.” ― Lil Wayne

I am not taking a selfie, I am just checking my camera quality.

Husbands are like fine wine. They take time to mature. – Letters to Juliet, the movie.

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here are a coffee and a million dollars.”

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.