What did one snowman say to the other one? “Do you smell carrots?”

“Honey? Where’s my super suit?” – The Incredibles

5% of statistics are made up. Like this one

If you are a Christmas tree growing next to a Santa tree, does this somehow change the taste of both fruits? Would you get a selfie

People say nothing is impossible. But I do nothing every day!

“I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.” – Malcolm Forbes

“A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.” – Michael de Montaigne

No point in holding onto what’s broken, so let’s live in the moment. When one door closes, another one opens. Stop trying to control it and start living in the moment

I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face but with words.

Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.

Is Google a boy or a girl? Obviously a girl because it won’t let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas.

Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. After 3 it should default to “Unstable”.

I am not feeling lazy actually. Actually, I am just incredibly motivated to do nothing.

You made me laugh so hard. Tears ran down my legs.

Best friends. Because of anyone else heard our conversations we’d end up in the mental hospital.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It’s the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.” – Christopher Moore, A Dirty Job

You can tell how much someone likes you by the number of times they show up in your selfies.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.