What does Charles Dickens keep in this spice rack? The best of Thymes, and the worst of Thymes.

“For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.” – Catherine Zeta-Jones

If you can’t remember my name, just say ‘chocolate’ … I’ll turn around.

When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.

If you find me offensive. Then I suggest you quit finding me.

The more you weight the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe eat cake.

You know that feeling when the really cute girl walks by in the mall, and you smile, try to be smooth, and take a drink of tea, and run the straw up your nose?

This may be the night that my dreams might let me know… All the stars are closer. — All the Stars by Kendrick Lamar & SZA

There are three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere: “Hold my purse.”

Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

I drink to make other people more interesting.

When it comes to work, change is inevitable, except for the vending machine.

After Monday and Tuesday, every calendar says WTF.

“Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s needs, but not every man’s greed.” – Gandhi

“If you are going through hell, keep going. Why would you stop in hell?” – Steve Harvey

One day I’ll be thankful that my kid is strong-willed. But that will not be today. Not in this grocery store.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.