When people asked, “what do you do”? Answer: “What Ever it takes”.

“I’m the guy who does his job. You must be the other guy.” – The Departed

” I don’t like money, actually, but it quiets my nerves.” – Joe Louis

You laugh. I laugh. You cry. I cry. You jump off a really tall cliff. I yell, “Do a flip!”

I knew I had to make you mine when you laughed at my jokes.

“Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.” – Bill Gates

Before spending time trying to find someone, you must first find yourself.

If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, maybe it really is a duck. Either accept it for what it is or let it go.

It’s not easy to save money when you have a fat girl’s appetite and a rich person’s shopping mentality.

My mom – Why is everything in your room on the floor? Me – “Mom, don’t you understand concept of gravity?

Shutting the fuck up is gluten-free. Add that to your diet.

Anyone who says their wedding day was the best day of their life, has never had 2 candy bars fall down at once from a vending machine.

They say don’t try this at home. So, I tried it at my friend’s home.

“Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives.” – Samuel Johnson

After Monday and Tuesday, every calendar says WTF.

I’d love to be a Pinterest mom. But it turns out I’m more of an Amazon Prime mom.

How do you call a pig that does karate? Pork Chop

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.

If you always do what you always did, you will always get what you got.

You know all those things you always wanted to do? You should go do them. 

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it makes you happy.

Life is like a camera: you focus on what is important, capture the good times, develop from the negative and if things do not work out, take another shot.

There are a lot of adventures out there waiting for you to live them. 

Better to see something once than to hear about it hundred times.

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on the train. 

The World is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.

One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.

To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.

We wander for distraction but we travel for fulfillment. 

The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going.